With my husband overseas again, I considered a boudoir shoot as a gift to him. But I cringed about the possibility at the same time. What would I wear?  I’m not a small woman so trying on items in the store isn’t always a possibility. I’ve gained some perspective about what beauty is over the years, but I rarely feel beautiful.

“I’ve never considered myself beautiful. When I met my husband, he would tell me all the time how beautiful I was, but I didn’t see myself that way. Fast forward twenty years in to our relationship. Marriage. Kids. 14 moves all over the world. Health issues that led to a total mastectomy. Yet, he still tells me how beautiful I am.”

Well, I happened to see Kristen’s Facebook post for 40 something women and I thought, what do I have to lose?  I signed up, and then the panic set in.

I had boxes coming in for two solid weeks with options to try! (Thank you Kristen for the list of stores!)  I liked the way a few looked, but worried about lumps and bumps and how those parts would photograph. Given that I’ve had a mastectomy and reconstruction, my chest is not what it was. Which terrified me about the photographs and not feeling feminine or woman enough.

I can honestly say that my feelings about beauty have changed with this boudoir session.  These fears were unfounded. I couldn’t have been more thrilled with my experience.  The makeup and hair styling were fabulous.

I looked like myself, but had an edge that gave me confidence!

When the photography session began, I kept thinking, she is going to see everything. How can she make this look good? My inhibition and fears quickly dissipated, as Kristen guided me. Her tips and poses encouraged me through the session.

“Afterwards I felt so good about myself, I felt beautiful! I went home and snapped a selfie with makeup and hair done and sent it to my husband, he loved it! When I told him about the session, he was blown away.”

He said it was the most meaningful gift I had ever given him.  He knows how much I struggle with putting myself out there and for him, it showed him how much I care about and love him.

When I went back for the ordering session, and saw the photographs myself, I almost cried.

I look amazing in the photographs – truly beautiful –  and for the first time I can see what my husband sees.  Which has made this experience worth more than I can explain.

To feel confidence and beauty in yourself is the ultimate gift to give yourself.

So thank you Kristen for not only helping me give a fabulous gift to my husband, but helping me to see my own beauty.